Embracing constraints

I recently forced myself to only solve a problem using only pen and paper and I realized I missed this so much. The best part is that weeks later, the process, the way I solved it, everything (!) is still burned into my head.

When I first came across the problem, my initial urge, like everyone nowadays, was to hit the easy button. The little magic box that only needs five words. I remembered that in university I would stay up until 4am trying to solve math proofs. I always wanted to give up and sleep, but I never did because I was a stubborn kid.

That same stubbornness showed up as I worked on this problem and I forced myself to solve it with just pen and paper. In the end, it took me a couple of hours, which is a little depressing considering an LLM would solve it instantly. But still, the feeling of solving something by myself was something I sorely missed.

This isn’t the first time I’ve done this, but every time there’s a nagging thought in the back of my head telling me I’m “wasting time” or “I shouldn’t spend more than X time on this.” It’s the tension between being productive and doing the hard thing. It turns out, though, that doing the hard thing is what I (we) need more of.

The dopamine hit, the feeling of achievement after solving a problem, is unlike anything else. This applies across all types of problems. I think it’s why I’ve always loved programming, no matter what my job was. Solving problems, especially the hard way, is one of the most rare and unique feelings in the world, and I never want to lose that. I don’t want to let the magic box take that from me.

There’s this mantra I keep repeating to myself whenever I use LLMs:

“Sooner or later, you have to pay the toll.”

It’s the idea that I either learn it now or I don’t learn it and suffer for it later. There are no shortcuts for skill and no way for you to deeply understand something without having done the requisite work. It’s why physically writing notes or typing code works a part of your brain that agents or LLMs will never reach.

This isn’t to say don’t use LLMs. I actually use them every day. Instead, it’s to remind us that our brain is a muscle and it needs to be worked.

Energy is not free; neither is understanding. There is a toll you must pay. You either pay it today, tomorrow, or months from now with interest. But you will always pay it. So, if you can, pay it today. You’ll feel better for it.